My social life = yay

Alright so really though my social life is like blossoming very quickly. And as it is happening I’m just like… wow. Is this me? going out and being social? It feels good it really does.

I’ve had a couple dates and I have more on the way. I’m not bragging I’m not saying this to say “oh my gawd I’m so fantastic so many guys just wanna be with me!” But out of those dates all of them won’t necessarily become lovers, some of them will become friends and that’s good for me because I really do need friends.

I also need more of a life. I need more hobbies. So now I’m on a desperate quest to find more hobbies. More things that I like to do. So hopefully with these new friendships will come new hobbies. And maybe you guys have ideas how I can go about getting new hobbies.

Another thing I want to do is get into more things online. I am here alot but I am just sitting here doing nothing. I like to talk to people, I like being apart of online communities and such, so I want to do more of those types of things too. You can meet pretty cool people on the internet. Even if you never meet them. So, need ideas on how to get that going too.

But umm I had a date today, the guy talked my ear off but I am not necessarily complaining at all he was nice and… different.

heh.

I enjoyed the date.

During our coffee date a guy came and he sat over at another table. Later on I found out he sat there on purpose. He was a dreamy looking guy. So after the date, I went back over to the guy and I told him that I thought he was gorgeous. That is out of character for me. If you’re not online and I can’t send you an email saying you’re gorgeous, [which I still rarely do because I’m a nervous little woman.] then I will just keep it to myself and talk about it with friends or something. But this time I did not. He asked to take my picture [he’s a photographer] for fun and it was cool. We ended up talking for about an hour and exchanging numbers to meet again. So I was happy about that. My boldness caused me to meet another interesting person who I will hang out with at a later time.

It feels good to be social. It feels nice to want to interact with people. And here I was a person who would rather be closed up at home than hanging out with someone and that is slowly changing. No, I’m not a person who enjoys big parties and clubs, but going to hang out at someone elses house maybe, is interesting to me. And going out to other places with folks is nice too.

I don’t think I wrote about this here but some time last week I went through this rough period where I thought that my being really sexual was a problem and maybe I should change that because it destroys relationships. But then I thought about my relationships, and they didn’t necessarily end because of the sex. There’s nothing wrong with being a sexual person and I find it slightly funny that I thought that why my relationships failed, was because I wanted a lot of sex. You can have sex and have healthy relationships too. And besides, it does take two to do the dirty deed [kay we know about the other options yes but they really aren’t relavant.] so if I had a problem then so did the other people. Not like they did it with me because I made them. So I’m done bashing myself for that and back to taking pride in it again.

I do want more though. More out of my life. I am going to school in the fall which is fantastic, I’m moving out soon and by the way I do enjoy my job at walmart. It’s a lot of work but the people make it fun. And plus I don’t mind working as long as I’m busy and not bored. So it’s a sweet deal. But I went through a transformation a few years ago and I began to love myself and embrace myself, and then I was done. And now I’m just like okay… what more is there to you Dyamond? I’m not very smart, I’m not dumb but I’m not smart. I don’t do things, I sit at home and…. I just think there should be more to me than my pretty face and my love for sex and music. So now I just want to change all that and develop myself a bit more? Is that the right thing to say? Possibly.

But that’s all with me. Besides my small inner struggle I’m doing okay. Life is good. I’m good. And… well hopefully you all are good too 🙂

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~ by dyadya on May 20, 2008.

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